When the world becomes too insane and pretends to blanket itself under the guise of ‘normalcy’…I run far away and hide….i create an ‘alternate reality’ and that’s where I currently reside…
A day before yesterday and an eternity ago in space….i was in a class where Milton’s secondary epic was being painfully dissected….each word was shaken for multiple meanings and the defeated rhythm of beauty that flowed in ‘Paradise Lost’ was truly lost to me forever….when you divide each letter and test its worth…you will more often than not….lose the worth that you were trying to decrypt…so I allowed my brain to flow in all directions….and surprisingly …it obeyed me eagerly…only reinforcing the proverb that it’s the easiest thing in the world to make someone do something they want to do….or something to that general effect….
Here are some of the thoughts that I jotted down with no more sinister purpose than to take another step towards unraveling the mystery that i find us to be…..as I often feel…there is no one quite as hard to understand…as me....
“Ever felt constricted by an image you believed you were and based your relationships on?
Would changing your identity or discovering it to be far-removed form what you believed it to be-change previous relationships forged on that premise.
If you previously believed your essence to be different from your understanding of it today- How much of an impact would it make on the established social relationships?
Does it make sense to make bonds based on commonalities between individuals as personality evolution will inevitably lead to a change in the perspectives previously considered as ethically similar or basic?
Will it ever make sense to define oneself when we change our own view of ourselves far too soon. Consistency in the human nature is lacking and leads to a feeling of insecurity.
Yesterday, someone said that as I don’t know who I am, I am dependant on other peoples opinion of me and hope to construe and convince them to keep it positive so as to maintain my self-esteem.
It is accurate.
29/01/08”
Another semi-interesting observation made by my mind as it floated somewhere near nowhere……-we tend to quote things that we perhaps find accurate and can somehow relate to….things unnatural to our environment are quite easy to forget…..
Leaving the world of romantic fantasy and teen-ache fiction….i casually slip back into the role of an observer….
Don’t you love it when you discover so many different (not to mention lovely fascinating and sometimes downright adorable!!!!!) sides of you?...
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