You know there are too many people in the house when you step on the welcome mat to dust your shoes and.... a billion particles of crap rise up chattering excitedly.. because of a million people having done the exact same thing 10 minutes before you.
You guess its time to exercise when your jogging tracks begin to grow moss on them. (and sprout a flower or two from the pockets)
You assume that its a phase when you feel like kicking away your cellphone and not talking to a person whose call you used to once wait for.
You know that words like 'theres always a silver lining' pop out of peoples mouth when the worst is yet to come, and they know it.
You guess meeting the author of a book in your course would be the highlight of your day and not a moment when you wanna doze off...(guesses can also be wrong)
You assume that when you have nothing to talk about, conversation will run out in a few minutes- so why doesnt it?
You know you should feel young...happy...lively at twenty. You know a hell lot of things...guess some more... assume nearly all. And then, reality bites all these preconceived notions in the bum.
:)
Friday, November 14, 2008
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
"Busy"
There comes a phase in every (every) girls life when she just wants to switch off her phone and allow calls/texts to pile up (in network space or wherever they go to 'wait')..14 to 40 hours later...casually switch it on... spend 20 mins reading the lamest of messages (no, no forwards, luckily my friends have outgrown that)... and then simply refuse to reply to them. sans guilt. wow. ah, the freedom to border on obviously rude- how i crave you.
For the last few days answering the phone has become a major chore of sorts. i look down at the screen, sigh and then answer. if only being human and moody was more acceptable. i guess it is but just not by everyone. Speaking of which (everyone) we had one of our rare lectures today.
Normally, NORMALLY most of our teachers would prefer to strip naked, cover themselves with ant-attracting syrup and jump into a 50 meter deep pit...rather than miss a lecture with the class. Very sincere i know and its much appreciated right about 3 days before the exam when we miraculously remember class discussions. However, that being said, most of us cheer LOUDLY when classes are cancelled. The 'Sons and Lovers' lectures are a pretty rare occurance, primarily cuz the teacher in question drfits in to class.. reads random excerpts... provokes a discussion which is bound to have an ambiguous end... and then strolls out after 35 mins (10-15 mins before the bell rings)... this is a RARE teacher... but also how college professors are SUPPOSED to behave (it was a myth fed to us in our pram hopping years)
Anyway, it was her assignment that was the first no-critics-our-opinion one in three years of college life.... and i loved it. Today we ended up having the longest discussion about who was really to blame for Paul and Miriam' break up. Frankly, the final thought remained that though Paul' mother did not like Miriam etc, ultimately we all make our choices... we cannot keep blaming our parents/friends for the decisions we make.. thats what growing up is about. accepting responsibility for the choices you make.
the choice to talk or stay mum, to act or wait to react, to think more or blindly follow faith..
to give it ONE last try or be sensible and turn our back to the barely-breathing past and move on to a fresh and perhaps more joyful future. All choices and the most sensible ones are not the most often picked when it comes to acting on them.. odd, but thats humans for you- twisted.
S, Sw and i hung out for our official 'picnic' today, and the talked to turned to sins (i-dont-know-how) ...and which one WE would commit if assured of no guilt- no karmic backlash- AND no one would EVER find out (except those we wish to tell)..... I wont tell you what S and i said but hell, we're evil enough. Sw (aww) is still rummaging up the darkest thing she can bring herself to do. *mwahahaha*... its okay Sw, we need good people like you to balance the rest of us :)
(Ps- though the dictionary believes otherwise, we have drawn clear distinctions b/w a person who indulges in 'bitchy' talk and someone who IS innately a 'beeetch'... you have to be a girl to figure it out...:D)
For the last few days answering the phone has become a major chore of sorts. i look down at the screen, sigh and then answer. if only being human and moody was more acceptable. i guess it is but just not by everyone. Speaking of which (everyone) we had one of our rare lectures today.
Normally, NORMALLY most of our teachers would prefer to strip naked, cover themselves with ant-attracting syrup and jump into a 50 meter deep pit...rather than miss a lecture with the class. Very sincere i know and its much appreciated right about 3 days before the exam when we miraculously remember class discussions. However, that being said, most of us cheer LOUDLY when classes are cancelled. The 'Sons and Lovers' lectures are a pretty rare occurance, primarily cuz the teacher in question drfits in to class.. reads random excerpts... provokes a discussion which is bound to have an ambiguous end... and then strolls out after 35 mins (10-15 mins before the bell rings)... this is a RARE teacher... but also how college professors are SUPPOSED to behave (it was a myth fed to us in our pram hopping years)
Anyway, it was her assignment that was the first no-critics-our-opinion one in three years of college life.... and i loved it. Today we ended up having the longest discussion about who was really to blame for Paul and Miriam' break up. Frankly, the final thought remained that though Paul' mother did not like Miriam etc, ultimately we all make our choices... we cannot keep blaming our parents/friends for the decisions we make.. thats what growing up is about. accepting responsibility for the choices you make.
the choice to talk or stay mum, to act or wait to react, to think more or blindly follow faith..
to give it ONE last try or be sensible and turn our back to the barely-breathing past and move on to a fresh and perhaps more joyful future. All choices and the most sensible ones are not the most often picked when it comes to acting on them.. odd, but thats humans for you- twisted.
S, Sw and i hung out for our official 'picnic' today, and the talked to turned to sins (i-dont-know-how) ...and which one WE would commit if assured of no guilt- no karmic backlash- AND no one would EVER find out (except those we wish to tell)..... I wont tell you what S and i said but hell, we're evil enough. Sw (aww) is still rummaging up the darkest thing she can bring herself to do. *mwahahaha*... its okay Sw, we need good people like you to balance the rest of us :)
(Ps- though the dictionary believes otherwise, we have drawn clear distinctions b/w a person who indulges in 'bitchy' talk and someone who IS innately a 'beeetch'... you have to be a girl to figure it out...:D)
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Yea yea, I'm here.
and no, its really me.. i'm not paying someone with double-chocolate oreo cookies to write for me... (good idea though)
This is going to be random... like those awful syrup packets they give with Diet Chips.. Really, thats their name. Identified solely as the products which will lead to less calories you need to burn off. Hence, desired.. purchased... munched on... (winced because of)... and then munched some more on. Ahem. My life 6 months ago. Now, its Kurkure. (i DID warn you about this posts 'random' status)
Speaking of which, i chose to ignore a friends clear (sensible) advice... She didnt even need to verbalise it, her hums-and-haws gave it all away. And okay, she was right as i knew she would be.
My point is, why do we jump into the mud with our eyes wide open.. and then complain when our clothes get dirty?!?... it felt like a question AND exclamation moment.. very rare i know.
Oh, if only we knew where to draw the line.. and not want to erase it after every few months.
There has GOT to be something good about being indecisive right? More choices?
Argh.
Ps- major chocolate cravings... now that the one-year-break-from-chocolate is coming to a crawling-ish end... it seems that the temptations out to get me. Just a couple of weeks left... and i'm acting like a lost puppy when people munch on (creamy... yummy... oh-so-delicious)bars of chocolate around me. I-need-a-distraction. Toffee?
and no, its really me.. i'm not paying someone with double-chocolate oreo cookies to write for me... (good idea though)
This is going to be random... like those awful syrup packets they give with Diet Chips.. Really, thats their name. Identified solely as the products which will lead to less calories you need to burn off. Hence, desired.. purchased... munched on... (winced because of)... and then munched some more on. Ahem. My life 6 months ago. Now, its Kurkure. (i DID warn you about this posts 'random' status)
Speaking of which, i chose to ignore a friends clear (sensible) advice... She didnt even need to verbalise it, her hums-and-haws gave it all away. And okay, she was right as i knew she would be.
My point is, why do we jump into the mud with our eyes wide open.. and then complain when our clothes get dirty?!?... it felt like a question AND exclamation moment.. very rare i know.
Oh, if only we knew where to draw the line.. and not want to erase it after every few months.
There has GOT to be something good about being indecisive right? More choices?
Argh.
Ps- major chocolate cravings... now that the one-year-break-from-chocolate is coming to a crawling-ish end... it seems that the temptations out to get me. Just a couple of weeks left... and i'm acting like a lost puppy when people munch on (creamy... yummy... oh-so-delicious)bars of chocolate around me. I-need-a-distraction. Toffee?
Friday, November 7, 2008
To whom i owe enough.
When i was still a 'performing-member' of my dramsoc, this was something i had written for my character. Its partly inspired by what may have been Begum Jaans thoughts in 'Lihaf' (by Ismat Chughtai)... At least my interpretation of the situation as it was.
Scene- A couple is dancing together
She Thinks "What is love? Is it the first glance you cast on me? The moment i knew i simply had to be yours. Hoping to one day feel your slender fingers brushing away stray hair from my face. Is it the warmth of your breath at night that i treasure so deeply? Sometimes, when you're asleep i tell myself that you're dreaming of me. That's why that smile crosses your face, right? I thought marriage would be the perfect union of bodies and souls. A pretty picture that grows only more beautiful with time. Each wrinkle adding grace to every passing year, and now the fairy tale has come true. I can hold you, claim your love. Display my devotion. But to what? A cold statue who performs his duties? Gives mechanical responses to my wails for attention. I can't leave you because i love you but why can't YOU end it? Must we dance this miserable waltz day in and out? I guess you don't see that your indifference hurts more than blatant rejection. But i love you still. So, what is love?"
(context- Trapped in a marriage with a homosexual man who she is in love with.)
I didnt really want to put this out into the vicious world.. frankly its far too precious to me. But this is my final act of vulnerability. With this, i finally say goodbye. I do not know if i will feel the urge to come back and continue my garbled version of life as i see it, here. I do not know if i will find some other way to 'vent it out'. But i DO know that this IS an end of sorts. There are very few moments when you are aware that things are changing at the exact moment that they are. Consider this my anagnorisis. Yes, after a long wait i've finally found one word to describe a vivid feeling, to the dot.
The beauty of the English language is remarkable.
Scene- A couple is dancing together
She Thinks "What is love? Is it the first glance you cast on me? The moment i knew i simply had to be yours. Hoping to one day feel your slender fingers brushing away stray hair from my face. Is it the warmth of your breath at night that i treasure so deeply? Sometimes, when you're asleep i tell myself that you're dreaming of me. That's why that smile crosses your face, right? I thought marriage would be the perfect union of bodies and souls. A pretty picture that grows only more beautiful with time. Each wrinkle adding grace to every passing year, and now the fairy tale has come true. I can hold you, claim your love. Display my devotion. But to what? A cold statue who performs his duties? Gives mechanical responses to my wails for attention. I can't leave you because i love you but why can't YOU end it? Must we dance this miserable waltz day in and out? I guess you don't see that your indifference hurts more than blatant rejection. But i love you still. So, what is love?"
(context- Trapped in a marriage with a homosexual man who she is in love with.)
I didnt really want to put this out into the vicious world.. frankly its far too precious to me. But this is my final act of vulnerability. With this, i finally say goodbye. I do not know if i will feel the urge to come back and continue my garbled version of life as i see it, here. I do not know if i will find some other way to 'vent it out'. But i DO know that this IS an end of sorts. There are very few moments when you are aware that things are changing at the exact moment that they are. Consider this my anagnorisis. Yes, after a long wait i've finally found one word to describe a vivid feeling, to the dot.
The beauty of the English language is remarkable.
Missed-conceptions
Been working. after what seems like years, finally. worked. No details. Not now anyway.
Worked on college work. Worked on DU newspaper. Worked. Worked till my eyes got red and fingers tired. Read till every bit of me was aching for a pillow to rest my head. Thought till my grey cells went on an indefinite strike. Dialled numbers, one after the other. Texted. Called. Missed Called. Punched in Digits. Working all the time. Venting out the steam bit by bit... one alphabet at a time.
The world isn't dismal. It cant possibly be, not with the awesome things that are happening in Sh's life. Its miraculous events shaping up right in front of our eyes. They've been conceived and are now coming out.. in all the gross child-birth imagery. The music is resounding in my ears. Some sounds are familar, others not. I am so not in the mood to watch that play tomorrow. I've been waiting for it all week, for multiple reasons. But now, im tired (predictably so) and dont want to care. Actually, do not care. All i feel is the music and the discomfort in my fingers as i point-blank refuse to give them a rest.
Finally some hardcore punjabi music. Yes. Fina-effing-lly. and no more need to think. Music does that, esp Punjabi music. Headbang time? Yes, we dont just head-bang to metal. Its Delhi. :)
Whoops. Song changed...'everybodies making love cause love is free...'
how bloody ironic is that?... haha? okay God, i promise to laugh . Maybe later, :)
(see Sh, im smiling and i wanna know, its just because of you... really. Thankyou)
OMG. "Begging you for mercy....".... Its time to slip on those dancing socks (umm, its kinda chilly) The Radio is haunted by my soul-ghost. How do you know which song to play? How? Are you peekin into my essence and cross-examining it for what it needs to hear? Even lyrics ive just been introduced to... are dancing on all the right chords. Making their presence felt... under my skin. Under the thinnest layer and flowing (in a medically improbable fashion) around. Wonderful. Time- 1.51 AM is the most amazing moment of every day, external stimuli wise. Ohmigod. Life is so inexplicable. Bloody insane ride.
i-am-going-to-make-it-all-work
ps-finally got my marks for that opinion based answer that i was once going ga-ga over. Validated. My opinion matters. Period. :) (for a tired, torn and exhausted person i'm quite chirpy... feel blessed. )
Worked on college work. Worked on DU newspaper. Worked. Worked till my eyes got red and fingers tired. Read till every bit of me was aching for a pillow to rest my head. Thought till my grey cells went on an indefinite strike. Dialled numbers, one after the other. Texted. Called. Missed Called. Punched in Digits. Working all the time. Venting out the steam bit by bit... one alphabet at a time.
The world isn't dismal. It cant possibly be, not with the awesome things that are happening in Sh's life. Its miraculous events shaping up right in front of our eyes. They've been conceived and are now coming out.. in all the gross child-birth imagery. The music is resounding in my ears. Some sounds are familar, others not. I am so not in the mood to watch that play tomorrow. I've been waiting for it all week, for multiple reasons. But now, im tired (predictably so) and dont want to care. Actually, do not care. All i feel is the music and the discomfort in my fingers as i point-blank refuse to give them a rest.
Finally some hardcore punjabi music. Yes. Fina-effing-lly. and no more need to think. Music does that, esp Punjabi music. Headbang time? Yes, we dont just head-bang to metal. Its Delhi. :)
Whoops. Song changed...'everybodies making love cause love is free...'
how bloody ironic is that?... haha? okay God, i promise to laugh . Maybe later, :)
(see Sh, im smiling and i wanna know, its just because of you... really. Thankyou)
OMG. "Begging you for mercy....".... Its time to slip on those dancing socks (umm, its kinda chilly) The Radio is haunted by my soul-ghost. How do you know which song to play? How? Are you peekin into my essence and cross-examining it for what it needs to hear? Even lyrics ive just been introduced to... are dancing on all the right chords. Making their presence felt... under my skin. Under the thinnest layer and flowing (in a medically improbable fashion) around. Wonderful. Time- 1.51 AM is the most amazing moment of every day, external stimuli wise. Ohmigod. Life is so inexplicable. Bloody insane ride.
i-am-going-to-make-it-all-work
ps-finally got my marks for that opinion based answer that i was once going ga-ga over. Validated. My opinion matters. Period. :) (for a tired, torn and exhausted person i'm quite chirpy... feel blessed. )
Monday, November 3, 2008
rum business
I had a super awesome concept all mapped out in my head. it had to be a pseudo-battle between what-i-think-im-like and what-i-want-to-convince-others-about-my-own-perception-bout-self (messy i know, you dont have to 'get' it) ..add to the murk another dollop of what-i-currently-think-i-would-like-HIM-to-think-of-me-as....
very twisted i know, probably i'll need about 40 years of therapy if i try and unravel exactly why i was intent on articulating that. Hmmpf. SO i wont try. See, i win.
but i got the whole 'the vision we have of ourselves is inaccurate' bit right. and then i went all loopy. became too personal and *chokes* personal. plus, not fun. just seemed like i was repeating what OTHER people had told me about me. how self-involved IS that?
you know, the usual bull crap like.. rosy pink+smart+worth more(wrt crushes)... yeah and the positive element. Meet bundle of joy that is me. Yehp right. They obviously have NOT been introduced to the crummy-cynical me that pops up every once in a while.
Actually, oddly enough they have but still stick like superglue to the ridiculous notion that i dont have a dark side. and this is not me fishing for 'Aww how adorable'. This is me clarifyin... where there is light then darkness is inevitable (at the most basic philosophical level)
i would like to be a lil mysterious-super-hero(ine) kinda hard-to-see-through person. Unfortunately as circumstances are... my cheeks and nose seem to spell out my life history for any innocent bystander to be subjected to. Plus my mouth has an annoying habit of giving-away every lil thing i wanna keep and hug to myself. Lack of self control. Tsk tsk.
No, i really dont do the 'blonde' bit and tell EACH bystander my 20 years of experience... but somehow, if anyone (with half a lousy brain) DOES bother to hang around and be chummy... they end up calculating how many chips im gonna grab before i buy the packet. OKay, again not SO bad but getting there fast. or maybe im hangin out with smart-er people these days. *gasp no!* :(
Anyway, as usual i seem to have rambled on for no good reason. im kind of happy that im now moving on from certain dead-end areas that have been lurking around the recesses of my mind for months now...they've eaten up MOST of my balance while examining them with S... and i've come to an almost unconscious decision in the most lovely gradual-edging-out way. and it doesnt even need will power. im a car running on automatic now. letting the path guide me, not with markers, but with the way the road curves. horribly fatalistic. But im afraid party number 2-3-4-5 (...) is going to get a little hurt. :( sorry but i hope your path is not too scratchy cuz of my screeching off it. i suggest you try and forgive me, cuz really.. im just trying to do my own thing without stepping on too many toes. Really.
and this applies to absolutely everyone in the universe....(even grey eyed aliens with vine-green arms)... try and emit a warning hum before exiting someone elses space, cuz when you leave with a WHOOSH then it leaves a vacuum, and no one likes to feel that empty (yes, the car metaphor just got translated to a wind/air thing).. people like solitude...yes (raises hand) but normally..normally when its self-imposed and you have the option of kicking open your door and letting people back in.
oh shut me up someone, i cant believe im still talking.
college tomorrow. hurrah?
very twisted i know, probably i'll need about 40 years of therapy if i try and unravel exactly why i was intent on articulating that. Hmmpf. SO i wont try. See, i win.
but i got the whole 'the vision we have of ourselves is inaccurate' bit right. and then i went all loopy. became too personal and *chokes* personal. plus, not fun. just seemed like i was repeating what OTHER people had told me about me. how self-involved IS that?
you know, the usual bull crap like.. rosy pink+smart+worth more(wrt crushes)... yeah and the positive element. Meet bundle of joy that is me. Yehp right. They obviously have NOT been introduced to the crummy-cynical me that pops up every once in a while.
Actually, oddly enough they have but still stick like superglue to the ridiculous notion that i dont have a dark side. and this is not me fishing for 'Aww how adorable'. This is me clarifyin... where there is light then darkness is inevitable (at the most basic philosophical level)
i would like to be a lil mysterious-super-hero(ine) kinda hard-to-see-through person. Unfortunately as circumstances are... my cheeks and nose seem to spell out my life history for any innocent bystander to be subjected to. Plus my mouth has an annoying habit of giving-away every lil thing i wanna keep and hug to myself. Lack of self control. Tsk tsk.
No, i really dont do the 'blonde' bit and tell EACH bystander my 20 years of experience... but somehow, if anyone (with half a lousy brain) DOES bother to hang around and be chummy... they end up calculating how many chips im gonna grab before i buy the packet. OKay, again not SO bad but getting there fast. or maybe im hangin out with smart-er people these days. *gasp no!* :(
Anyway, as usual i seem to have rambled on for no good reason. im kind of happy that im now moving on from certain dead-end areas that have been lurking around the recesses of my mind for months now...they've eaten up MOST of my balance while examining them with S... and i've come to an almost unconscious decision in the most lovely gradual-edging-out way. and it doesnt even need will power. im a car running on automatic now. letting the path guide me, not with markers, but with the way the road curves. horribly fatalistic. But im afraid party number 2-3-4-5 (...) is going to get a little hurt. :( sorry but i hope your path is not too scratchy cuz of my screeching off it. i suggest you try and forgive me, cuz really.. im just trying to do my own thing without stepping on too many toes. Really.
and this applies to absolutely everyone in the universe....(even grey eyed aliens with vine-green arms)... try and emit a warning hum before exiting someone elses space, cuz when you leave with a WHOOSH then it leaves a vacuum, and no one likes to feel that empty (yes, the car metaphor just got translated to a wind/air thing).. people like solitude...yes (raises hand) but normally..normally when its self-imposed and you have the option of kicking open your door and letting people back in.
oh shut me up someone, i cant believe im still talking.
college tomorrow. hurrah?
Sunday, November 2, 2008
meh .me. i
do you know how effin unfair it is to be awake at 3 am in your friends house with nothing to do???..... when BOTH your friends have dropped off to sleep... (post ahem dinner and drinks)...
so. what have i learnt today?...a lot actually but i dont feel like really sharing most of it.
primarily... i dont get high. correction..some innate reflexive thing stops me from getting too high or losing control. phobia? while other people are comfortable enough to flop around madly..i get to be party pooper...:(
what IS it with me and responsibility??....why do i always tug at its sleeves and it at mine?
but at least i danced like CRAZY. that was F-U-N.
i have so much to say and so little reason to put it into words over here.
feel like this space too has been invaded by nameless beings who make it hard-er for me to articulate what i once used to find easy. grr.
im gonna do something really soon. like maybe catch a yellow fish with a sky-blue net and then put it in my pocket. or maybe ill just keep writing more crap till sleep grabs on to my (borrowed) pjs and drags me to the bed. (ah. high hopes. i feel chirpy... wtf..its 3.14 am now)
today, blah-ly speaking, we played cards... talked... danced etc. .... the thing is...
i still feel like im playing dress-up in my elder sisters clothes with HER friends...
it doesnt seem anything like me.
been having the oddest urge to go and shake someone awake.... and say... TALK....TALK to me.
lets discuss the stars, moon, sun, pond-life, computer glitches, fashion, movies ANYTHING. but lets talk. dont leave me alone to mull over the movie 'cube'. i saw it right now. at around 1 am. (they packed off to bed at 12.45)...and i dont know what to think about it. i feel like Talking people... how hard is it to converse?...and the only person i called up (at 12.49) was fast asleep. bummer. :(
this is SO stream-of-consciousness. conrad will be proud. maybe pat me on the back and then run after my doggie. i miss my doggie's. (plural, please note). i wanna bury my face into them and nearly-strangle em with mii louuuv. gross right? but thats how much i want someone to be awake. *sigh*
i wonder when ill get bored of typing. wonder. wonder. wonder.
not anytime soon i think.
my cellphone is so dead. i never knew staying up would be so lame. where are the effin owls anyway?...hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo (owl call/hoot)
oh blah. if only wit flowed like wine. and wine was as cheap as water. and water was as clean as could be.
what heavenly times we live in. my eyes are finally goin a lil red (i think)
im gonna go cuddle up to buddies.
night-y night.
may you all get to stay up till 3.23 am and watch 'cube' alone.
(i will not dish up a review)
so. what have i learnt today?...a lot actually but i dont feel like really sharing most of it.
primarily... i dont get high. correction..some innate reflexive thing stops me from getting too high or losing control. phobia? while other people are comfortable enough to flop around madly..i get to be party pooper...:(
what IS it with me and responsibility??....why do i always tug at its sleeves and it at mine?
but at least i danced like CRAZY. that was F-U-N.
i have so much to say and so little reason to put it into words over here.
feel like this space too has been invaded by nameless beings who make it hard-er for me to articulate what i once used to find easy. grr.
im gonna do something really soon. like maybe catch a yellow fish with a sky-blue net and then put it in my pocket. or maybe ill just keep writing more crap till sleep grabs on to my (borrowed) pjs and drags me to the bed. (ah. high hopes. i feel chirpy... wtf..its 3.14 am now)
today, blah-ly speaking, we played cards... talked... danced etc. .... the thing is...
i still feel like im playing dress-up in my elder sisters clothes with HER friends...
it doesnt seem anything like me.
been having the oddest urge to go and shake someone awake.... and say... TALK....TALK to me.
lets discuss the stars, moon, sun, pond-life, computer glitches, fashion, movies ANYTHING. but lets talk. dont leave me alone to mull over the movie 'cube'. i saw it right now. at around 1 am. (they packed off to bed at 12.45)...and i dont know what to think about it. i feel like Talking people... how hard is it to converse?...and the only person i called up (at 12.49) was fast asleep. bummer. :(
this is SO stream-of-consciousness. conrad will be proud. maybe pat me on the back and then run after my doggie. i miss my doggie's. (plural, please note). i wanna bury my face into them and nearly-strangle em with mii louuuv. gross right? but thats how much i want someone to be awake. *sigh*
i wonder when ill get bored of typing. wonder. wonder. wonder.
not anytime soon i think.
my cellphone is so dead. i never knew staying up would be so lame. where are the effin owls anyway?...hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo (owl call/hoot)
oh blah. if only wit flowed like wine. and wine was as cheap as water. and water was as clean as could be.
what heavenly times we live in. my eyes are finally goin a lil red (i think)
im gonna go cuddle up to buddies.
night-y night.
may you all get to stay up till 3.23 am and watch 'cube' alone.
(i will not dish up a review)
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